Monday, February 25, 2013

The Many Faces of Me

I have struggled with my weight my whole life. In high school I was a cheerleader, on the basketball team, captain of the volleyball team and threw shot put and discus for track and field. Needless to say I was always working out-but in my mind, I was fat. Then came college and I made friends with a girl that loved to run. Running was so freeing to me, exhilarating  But through all of that, I still viewed myself as that chubby girl from grade school.

When I married, I weighed 131 lbs and in the best shape of my life.  I wore a bikini on our honeymoon, for the first and probably the last time in my life! But then I found myself on the plane wearing a dress that I bought in Hawaii, that fit perfectly not 3 days before, squirming in my seat because the dress now felt 2 sizes two small. My weight just ballooned from there.

I just started a 3 days cleanse and I have realized, probably for the first time, what an emotional and bored eater I am. But I am bound and determined to make this lifestyle change.  It doesn't just stop after three days, that is just a jump start.  I am 10 lbs lighter than I was 6 months ago when we moved. I don't want to be the 131 lbs I was 11 years ago, I just want to be healthy. I want to be alive to grow old with my husband! I know that I will have my struggles, I will always be an emotional eater and I will most likely always have a body image problem, but I know that with God's help, I can be healthy again.
L to R, Top to Bottom: Brent and I at a shower before our wedding-11 years ago, us with Ziti-we had been married around 4 years in that photo, the bottom left picture was taken of me about 5 months ago and the last picture was taken last week.

1 comment:

ae said...

Every little step and little change matters. It was about a year or so ago that I finally started getting serious about getting healthy. I have found that it really is a lifestyle change. Before I would try all the fad diets and fail miserably at them. But one day something just clicked. Now I just eat healthier and exercise more. I sounds so simple, but it is not really. I still have times where I eat horribly but I have learned to just start over the next day. Used to when I would eat bad one day that would turn into a week and then a month. But now I just chock it up to a bad day and start over the next. I know I have now written a book. ;) But I just wanted to encourage you! At first it may seem like nothing is changing but just stick with it and you will see a difference!

Glad to see your blogging again! I have been a horribly inconsistent blogger myself the past year!